Good Food Indian Halal Take Away, 2nd February 2008

Good Food Indian Halal Take Away
15 St. Stephens Rd
Norwich
Norfolk
NR1 3SP

01603 765119
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It's almost endearing that the Good Food Indian Halal Take Away forgo the self indulgent restuarant names you might find littered down Prince of Wales Road on a Friday night on the tiles. It doesn't claim to be the best, or super, mega, fantastic or anything other overtly hyperbolic you might care to think of. It appears a genuine evaluation, an honest description. You have to admire it. The first thing to note is that the delivery was quick. Really, extremely quick. Not that you can read too much in to that on a one time basis. The roads could have been clear, every traffic light could have been green, the establishment could have been merely yards from our house. Still, it boded well for the rest of the experience.
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I'm unsure if this is common knowledge, and that by making this revelation I am simply exposing myself as a mere novice of take away reviewing, but my chicken biryani came with rice and and a seperate foil dish of sauce to go over it. This, in addition to the basmati rice I had also ordered provided a veritable mountain of food. We had also ordered a Kima naan and Bombay potato to share, which in total had come to £16.55 between the two of us which is about average. Of course, given the quantity anomaly which had occured this evening, it did appear exceptional value and rather a daunting challenge. There were no gratuities to speak of, other than the standard bag of onion mush which never looks particuarly apetising and is inevitably discarded without a second thought.
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It looked good too, primarily because it wasn't comparable to a castle surrounded by a moat of oil as is so often the case. Not only that, but there were vegetables in it. And not just the expected token, sad, solitary oninions, but sweetcorn, courgettes, mushrooms. It looked vaguely, well, nutritional. It tasted excellent too, a fresh spicy taste, but not so much as to lessen the flavour. It was hearty, warm and filling, but not in the chemically enhanced way that sits uneasily in your stomach, making you wish you'd known better.

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Verdict: There aren't a great deal of Indian takeaways in Norwich, and the ones that do exist rarely do enough to justify your continual loyalty to them. In the Good Food Indian Halal Takeaway, I might well have found one whose menu is worth holding on to.

The Riverbank Chinese Buffet, Monday 28th January, 2008

Riverbank Chinese Buffet

Norwich

Norfolk

NR1 1ED

United Kingdom

01603 612323

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I'd done it. Somehow it had happened. I'd convinced my girlfriend that an 'all you can eat Chinese buffet' was a plausible solution to our midday pangs of hunger. How this had happened was really anybody's guess. The phrase 'all you can eat' is one which invariably triggers a sense of challenge to the self respect of any 21st century man. Of course there are no real winners, but every visit is always greeted with fresh, albeit brief, hope and revitalised enthusiasm. The Riverbank Chinese Buffet sits in the midst of the riverside development which has taken a rather servere turn for the worst since part of it began to show signs of iminently sinking in to the river. Frankly, the tedium of bowling and slot machines make the risk of severe flooding look like it would improve the excitement factor no end, thoughts not shared by the county council.

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Six pounds fifty for lunch may seem like good value for money considering it gives you free licence to gourge yourself on noodles for three hours. On the other hand, how often do you really eat four plates of food, plus desert, for lunch? It's really all relative. On the one hand, yes, you're getting a lot more food for not a great deal more money, but since it's food you wouldn't have eaten anyway, is it really the bargain it seems? The room is filled with a combination of the disorientated elderly, hungry students, and a variety of people who look like extras from homeowner loan adverts taking a break from consolodating all their debts in to one easy monthly payments. None of them look particularly, well, happy. They all appear either forced to be there, or as if they have nowhere else to go.

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The interior was spacious, if a little souless. Rows of identical tables, surrounded by eggshell blue walls adorned with laminate Chinese lettering glued to them with good intention, but done with so little care as to demonstrate that the Riverbank buffet is very much a volume business. There's no foreplay, no time to savour the atmosphere or enjoy the view. It's down to business. The food is good, some of it could do with being hotter, and the vat of curry sauce looks a little ominous. It has a skin. Frankly, it shouldn't. The tapkenyaki is very tasty, and although there aren't really enough variations of raw ingredients to make it worth choosing them in advance and then having them cooked in front of you, it is a nice touch and does look impressive.

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Verdict: In reality, the Riverbank leaves you with a simple choice. Pay £6.50 to gorge yourself with noodles for as long as your tormented stomach will allow, or pay a premium for more desirable surroundings and more elequent dining. But where does the costcutting stop? Why don't we all just discard cutlery altogether, and eat with our hands out of one big, communal trough and shave another pound from the cost? Or better still, negate the trough and eat off the floor until someone rises from the mound of assorted dishes, proclaims that enough is enough, and asks what we have all become? After all, what, in essence, is the point of eating out? It's the ambience, the atmosphere, the company. Surely binging like the island dwellers of Lost finally getting off the island, and tasting food on the mainland again for the first time is somewhat missing the point, isn't it? It's hard to fault the Riverside's value for money, it's eagerness to please or it's hospitality. It just fundamentally misses the point, and it's clientel of the absurdly obsese, disorientated elderly, and hungry students appear to reflect it.